Almost

I almost said it.
I almost told you i loved you.
I almost let it come out.
I almost kissed you.
I almost said yes when you proposed.
I almost married you.
I almost made the biggest mistake of my life.
But i did one thing all the way.
I did save my life...
And yours.
That i didnt almost do.
That i achieved.
That...
That i did fully.
If i had fully said yes.
We would both be dead.
If i had fully married you.
I would have died.
And it would have killed you.
If i had fully said i loved you...
Even though i didnt...
I still have died.
I still failed to get better.
I still had lung cancer.
I still felt love.
Love for you.
Though i never said it out loud,
I do.
I loved you with all that i was.
I am sorry that i could only do almost.
But it was better for us both.
I almost said it.
I am not almost sorry.
I am sorry.